Yoga teacher training & the soul of a butterfly 🦋

3 days ago
4 min read

There was another reason The Good Dinosaur 🦕 stayed with me (refer to my last blog), and this one was much more personal because throughout the film I kept looking at Arlo and seeing my Zaccy 🦕.

I always look at Zaccy and think he has the soul of a butterfly 🦋. He's such a gentle soul. He's so... gentle. There's honestly no other word I can think of to describe him, and I absolutely love him for that.

But there's also the old school dad in me that thinks you need more than that in this world we're trying to navigate. You can't be a Buddha in the world of Trumps because this world will eat you alive 😵‍💫.

So sometimes I've put pressure on myself to do more as a dad, to toughen him up a little perhaps, to prepare him for the world as I see it through my lens, and it's taken me quite a while to recognise that my influence, my protectiveness and everything I want for Zaccy can actually end up becoming another burden for him to carry 😵‍💫.

And I know that probably seems obvious from the outside looking in, but watching Arlo made something click.

Arlo's dad wants him to be braver too. He wants him to overcome his fear and become stronger, and of course it's coming from love, but ultimately his dad can't make him courageous. In fact, life doesn't really make him courageous either because the courage was already there. Life simply puts him in situations where he has to discover it for himself.

And maybe that's what I've been getting wrong with Zaccy 😵‍💫.

Maybe he's not too soft and maybe he doesn't need me to make him stronger. He's already brave and he's already courageous. Life just hasn't had to challenge that part of him yet.

I grew up without a male role model or father figure to teach me things. I had to learn how to brush my own teeth, kick a ball, throw a punch, all by myself and work so many things out for myself. Zaccy has always had me there, and perhaps because I didn't have that, I've tried too hard to make sure he does.

But maybe part of my job is allowing him to get a little lost too, because if I'm forever clearing every obstacle out of his way, how does he ever discover what he's capable of when he has to climb over one himself?

If I actually asked him what he needs from me, I reckon he'd probably say, "Nothing, Dad. Just be there when I need you."

Which goes back to something I wrote recently. I used to say that I wanted to be a good dad, but I don't really want to be a good dad anymore because I've realised that's partly about me and the expectations I've created for myself.

I just want to be his dad ❤️🦋.

The art of teacher training isn't to give you all the answers. It's to show you enough of the way that eventually you trust yourself to work the rest out, because just like Arlo 🦕, at some point you have to experience getting a little lost before you discover that you actually know how to find your own way home. And I'll be there if and when you need me.

And strangely, I feel the same way about teaching yoga now. I don't try particularly hard to be a good yoga teacher anymore either. I teach what I love, I share what I've experienced and try to be there when somebody needs me, but ultimately their path is theirs to walk.

In fact, you could probably go back and read this entire email again through the lens of teaching yoga 👀. You don't have to show someone exactly how to find their way home. Sometimes you just need to be there and reassure them that they'll find their own way.

And our teacher training is much the same.

At first, it can be frustrating that we don't give you a script to memorise or a list of cues to remember. I don't tell you exactly what is right and wrong, and that's hard because as the student you're desperate for that black-and-white guidance. Just tell me what to say. Tell me where the foot goes. Tell me what's right. Tell me what's wrong.

But I think that old-school method of teacher training has created one insecure, parroting yoga teacher after another 🦜, holding onto their scripts like a child holds onto their favourite blanket because nobody ever taught them how to think for themselves.

The art of teacher training isn't to give you all the answers. It's to show you enough of the way that eventually you trust yourself to work the rest out, because just like Arlo 🦕, at some point you have to experience getting a little lost before you discover that you actually know how to find your own way home. And I'll be there if and when you need me.

🦋

Namaskar

Zahir

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