Yoga Philosophy from the Good Dinosaur 🦕

I bumped into someone Friday who I knew when I was younger (from the ol' neighbourhood). I haven’t seen him for a very long time, and one of the first things he commented on was my tattoos 😵‍💫.

He looked at my arms and said how "dirty" they were. I grinned and said, “Better to have dirty arms and a clean heart than the other way around.” He sort of mumbled something, then said, “Well, you’re a yoga guru now, aren't you?”

I said, “Nah mate. I’m nothing. I’m just me. I don’t try to be anything. I'm not going to live up to your cultural expectations by not having tattoos, and I won't live up to modern yoga standards either.”

The irony of him judging me whilst he was vaping away didn't go unnoticed either. I said, “You look like you're one burger away from a heart attack, but I don't judge you. Live your life and leave me alone.”

And as some of you who know my short fuse might have guessed, there may have been the odd F bomb in there too 😵‍💫🫣💣.

Again, he sort of mumbled something and we left it there.

But I thought about that conversation afterwards because there was something about it that stayed with me once I was no longer annoyed at this fool's audacity. I spent so much of my younger life trying to be something. Trying to fit in. Trying to be a certain way, behave a certain way, live up to whatever identity was imposed on me. And then as an adult there is the yoga caricature that so many of us subconsciously live up to as well. Bendy, flexible, man bun, chia seeds, fake grin and smelling of seaweed.

But I think I reached a point in my life a while ago where I’m just not interested in "being" anymore.

I don’t try to be a yoga guru. I don’t even really try to be a yoga teacher. I don’t suddenly become someone different when I walk into the studio. I talk to my students pretty much how I talk to my friends. If you bumped into me in Tesco or sat down and had a coffee with me, you’d pretty much get the same person. Even when I practise yoga, I’m not trying to be yogic. I just move.

And actually, for someone who has practised yoga for as long as I have, I’m not particularly good at it. My hamstrings are ridiculously tight (or just toned? 🧐). I’m not that good at handstands. I’m not particularly good upside down. I’m not exceptionally flexible.

The weird thing is, as a yoga teacher, this should bother me. I should strive to do better, but truth be told, I don’t really care.

And there is something incredibly peaceful about that. Some would call it a RELEVATION (that's the correct spelling, watch *The Good Dinosaur* 🦖).

Maybe some of it is age. Maybe it’s Laura and Zaccy. Maybe it’s losing people along the way and realising how little time any of us actually have here. But somewhere along the line I think I stopped trying quite so hard to become something and started becoming much more comfortable with simply being as I am. And there is a strange freedom that comes with that. I don't need yoga to confirm I'm a yogi, weights to confirm I am strong, my body to confirm I'm attractive, or other people's approval to confirm I am worthwhile.

And this feeling of peacefulness that arrived organically is suprisingly overwhelming and emotional.

When articulating this to my oracle Laura, it felt like a RELEVATION. Like a weight off my shoulders or a veil lifted from my eyes. It's a peace inside that we don't even know we need, which is why I think it feels so emotional.

I'm not saying this feeling is like the enlightenment of yoga or the Nirvana of the Buddha. I don't know what that is. This is something else. Just peace finding you when you stop putting obstacles in its way.

When I was on the mat today doing my sun salutations ☀️, I wasn't trying to be yogic or bendy or anything else. I wasn't trying to be anything. I was doing something because I love doing it and not because I needed the outcome to complete my identity.

So rather than seek approval, I stood on my mat, closed my eyes and said to Yoga, “I am who I am. Accept me for who I am. I don't care about my tight hamstrings. I just want to live and move with dirty arms and my clean heart” ❤️

And it's reflecting on the most important part of my life too. Being a dad. I've tried so hard to be a good dad as that's all I ever wanted and all I want today. Now I'm not trying so hard because Zaccy doesn't need me to try hard, he just needs Daddy to be.

So maybe the question is, who would you be if you stopped trying so hard to be someone?

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Namaskar - Eternal Seeker

Zahir Akram

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